I like to believe I am a student of life. (Perhaps that’s because I had so much fun in university and NEVER ever want to leave that
keg mindset behind. 😉 ) I played Grasshopper at a very young age to my Dad’s philosophical gems; I soaked up new ideas via other cultures as an Anthropology student; and have continued to aim for self-betterment and greater understanding at every stage of my life. Thankfully, I am surrounded by like-minded people who seek to better me teach me by their patience, equanimity, compassion and love that this life is beautiful beyond any description and that true sustained happiness is a reality.
As some of you know, I do not forgive easily. And I never ever forget. I have struggled with this for some time now and have blogged about it before, I know. And while I think time is such a miraculous balm for the soul, occasionally a shift in perspective does wonders. It’s faster too. If my Dad were still with me, I would simply turn to him and he would instantly have the answer. Now, it might be a lofty concept that I would have to mull over before wrapping my head around or it might be as simple as “eff it, move on already”, but either way it would be “problem solved”. Without him, I turn to other sources. This is the best I’ve found for my quandary…
When we come into contact with the other person, our thoughts and actions should express our mind of compassion, even if that person says and does things that are not easy to accept. We practice in this way until we see clearly that our love is not contingent upon the other person being loveable. – Thich Nhat Hanh
And, really, how true that is. I’m sure we’ve all experienced this to one degree or another. With our family and friends, we readily overlook negatives in them when they would be highly noticeable in a stranger. (And please oh please keep over-looking my flaws, dear family and friends. xo) Compassion for others is paramount so this concept works for me. I know that people who behave badly are dealing with so much sh*t in their own lives, that the negative fills up their cup and it overflows. (I just wish it wouldn’t flow all over me!)
Dear unloveable person, I love you regardless. And, honestly, this should do the trick for me. And somehow, somewhere, forgiveness will either come or be rendered unnecessary. Now, take it and go. And have a good one. xoxo